Sunday 30 January 2022

REVIEW: The Amityville Uprising (2022)

Review By Jon Donnis
I seem to be reviewing a lot of B movies recently, the latest one to come across my desk is The Amityville Uprising, released by Lionsgate. Not sure why Lionsgate are making and releasing B movies, they clearly don't need the small change that this film would make.

The film starts off with some terrible CGI showing a chemical blast at a military base. The general idea of the story is that this strange blast, creates a cloud of toxic acid rain. Most of the story takes place at a police station.

Now as I have mentioned before, there are Good Terrible movies and Bad Terrible movies. So where does this one fit in. Well its tough to say. The film is roughly 80 minutes long, HOWEVER, here is an awesome life hack I am going to give you right now. You can watch the entire film in 40 minutes! All you need to do is fast forward the first 40 minutes, and then start to watch from there.

I say this because the first 40 minutes is literally just people talking to each other about not very interesting things. Don't get me wrong, there is some funny one liners in there, but action wise, nothing really happens.
But the second 40 minutes of the film, it all picks up. The toxic acid rain will kill you, if it touches your skin, it will also then raise you up as a Zombie. The film is all about a few people trying to stay alive and kill zombies. Pretty standard stuff, but there are some funny one liners in there. I rarely laugh at such films, but the makers of this film realised that they had a very low budget and a crap storyline, so actually made the effort to have some funny lines, which I quite enjoyed. Throw in the fact you can see the whole film in 40 minutes, and it crosses that line into "Good Terrible".

There is also some really dumb clips from fake news broadcasts, which made me laugh, as well as a bizaree video game like feature, where upon the first time you are introduced to a character, you get a screen like below.

It makes no sense, but I just kinda liked it.

I also want to applaud the film makers for the ending, FINALLY we get an ending in a Zombie film that makes sense.

The Good
I enjoyed the sillyness and one liners.

The Bad
The first 40 minutes are a waste of time.

The film is stupid, but I still kinda liked it. I thought the ending was good, and the one liners made me laugh.

I score The Amityville Uprising (for a B movie), a solid 7/10